An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.Proverbs 31:10-12
One wonders if there is a message in this wonderful picture for King Lemuel? He has been warned of the dangers of the 'strange woman'; here, in contrast, is the kind of wife he ought to look for! It is a useful yardstick by which to measure, and with all a useful standard for the ladies themselves! Kidner warns against taking this standard as being within the reach of all, since it presupposes unusual gifts and material resources. Rather, he adds, 'it shows the fullest flowering of domesticity, which is revealed as no petty and restricted sphere, and its mistress as no cipher'. This is for us perhaps the important emphasis - 'no petty or restricted sphere' - in view of the fairly widespread feelings often expressed today of frustration and restriction. Do these words say to us, 'It is what you make it' in all events, it is the 'creative' emphasis that is significant in these verses. Here is a woman who has carved out for herself an interesting life; and although this particular pattern and expression may not be for all, the principle is surely valid, and some kind of creative and interesting and fulfilling pattern can be evolved.
In 10-12 we see this woman in relation to her husband. 'Virtuous woman' is translated by RSV as 'a good wife'. Does not everything start here? If this relationship is wrong, everything is wrong. This applies just as much to those who are not married as to those who are: for if attitudes are wrong; how much of life is coloured by resentments, frustrations, preoccupations, hankerings, which corrode the human heart and put people hopelessly out of sorts. We should note also the emphasis on 'trust', even more than on 'love' 12 fulfils the biblical idea and ideal of 'help-meet', one who 'stands over against’ the husband, to challenge him to be all he can be, and to rise to his real destiny.